April 14, 2018
3. Put the Parent Status to One Side and Treat Children on an Equal Footing
When educating our children, we often hear parents saying: “I am your mother (I am your father), so you should listen to me. I’m doing all this for you.” Very often, it’s this kind of power control which increasingly alienates us from our children and even sours the relationship. In fact, this kind of control is not as per God’s will and is the manifestation of our arrogance. All of us are created by God, yet God is humble and hidden. He never suppresses us in his capacity as God. He does not force us to listen to His words or to act according to the truth. Nor has He said how He will treat us if we do not act according to His words. Rather, He gives us the space to choose freely. This is God’s attitude and manner toward us, created humanity. We are created beings just like our children and our status is equal. What right do we have to demand that our children listen to us and do as we demand? If we always take the position of the parent and control children with power then this is a manifestation of our arrogance, conceit and lack of reason. Children actually resent this about parents the most. If we can resolve this problem, we can get along with our children properly. How can this problem be resolved? God’s words say: “Treat your children, treat those in your own family the same as you would an ordinary brother or sister. Although you have a responsibility, a fleshly relationship, nevertheless the position and perspective you should have is the same as with friends or ordinary brothers and sisters. That is, you can’t control, you can’t restrain your children, and always try to keep in command and have complete control over them. Let them make mistakes, let them say the wrong things, let them do childish and immature things, do stupid things. No matter what happens, sit down and calmly talk with them, communicate and seek. Don’t you think this attitude is good? Isn’t it right? So, what is being let go here? (Position and pride.) It is the letting go of the position and status of a parent, the airs of a parent, and all of the responsibility one thinks they should assume, everything that one thinks they should be doing as a parent; instead, it’s enough that one does the best they can in terms of their responsibility as an ordinary brother or sister” (“What Should One Possess, at the Very Least, to Have Normal Humanity” in Records of Christ’s Talks).
God’s words have pointed out the actual path to resolving this parent-child relationship. That is, that we must let go of the parental position and status and treat children as our equals, as God demands. We must learn how to communicate with our children and open our hearts to them, listen to them patiently, understand children’s true thoughts and difficulties, help them learn how to distinguish right from wrong according to God’s words and guide them to have the right pursuits and life goals. When children make mistakes, we must not teach them based on corrupt disposition, but instead communicate with them based on love and patience and give them time and process to change. Just as when we lie, deceive and sin against God, God gives us the opportunity to repent and change. He uses love to influence and God’s words and the truth to shepherd, supply and support us. When we practice in this way, children are willing to be close to us, and there will be no difficulties in getting on with our children.
When getting along with children, some brothers and sisters practice in this way: They lead the child before God and bring the child to pray to God and read God’s words. Under the leadership of God’s words, children will be able to distinguish, know what actions please God and what God loathes. In everyday life, children will also rely on God, actively practice the word of God and shun all kinds of evil habits, eschew temptation and be guarded and cared for by God. When their children make mistakes sometimes, they can correctly deal with their mistakes according to the word of God, come before God with their children and seek the truth to resolve the problem. Both parent and child can practice the word of God and live by the word of God. In this way, they will surely be blessed by God, the generational gap between parent and child and any misunderstandings between them will disappear naturally and the relationship will return to normal.
In fact, all relationships between people today are particularly tense. From society to family, from groups to individuals, there are no normal interpersonal relationships between people. This is all because mankind has been too deeply corrupted by Satan. Everyone is full of Satan’s corrupt disposition: being arrogant, conceited, self-righteous, self-important, crooked, deceitful, and selfish. This is the root cause of tensions between people. But as long as we all come to God to pursue the truth and resolve our corrupt disposition, are able to live by the word of God and be honest, then the bright, peaceful, harmonious good life that mankind yearns for shall naturally appear, and we will also receive God’s protection and blessing, live in God’s light and have a happy life. Therefore, the best medicine for resolving the generation gap problem is in the word of God because Almighty God says: “My words are the truth, the life, the way, and a double-edged sword, which can defeat Satan. Those that understand and have a path to practice are blessed” (Utterances and Testimonies of Christ in the Beginning).
Sister XX, we hope that our fellowship can bring you a little help in resolving your difficulties. And finally, may God lead you and bless you! We also hope that your relationship with your son will return to normal as soon as possible under the leadership of God and that there will be no more anguish. May you both live in the word of God and receive God’s care and protection. All glory be to God, Amen!
Brothers and sisters of The Church of Almighty God
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