One night, I put my phone on the table, and I didn’t expect that my husband would pick it up and look through my chat record with my sister. He very angrily said to me, “You are still in contact with them, and your chat lasted for two hours.” Then, he showed me more negative information online. He also used various ways to monitor me and prevent me from having contact with my sister on my phone. I lost my church life again, and couldn’t get help from my sister. After that, my husband kept sending me the rumors he found online, and disturbed and obstructed me from having any contact with my brothers and sisters. My husband’s persecution and obstruction made me miserable, and unconsciously I began to feel weak again, “Why is my husband so opposed to me believing in
Almighty God? I only want to
believe in God, why is it so hard? When can I believe in God without so much disturbance? Is this going to be my life from now on?” When I thought of that, I tried to stop my tears from falling, but I couldn’t, and I felt especially lonely and helpless. I didn’t know how I could go on, and I can’t count how many times I cried over that feeling. In my misery, all I could do was pray to God, “God! I don’t know what to do in the face of my husband’s persecution, I don’t know how to experience this, but I believe that whatever the environment, You have Your good intentions. I ask for Your guidance and the faith to experience this.”